Sunday, May 3, 2009


Thank the G-ddess! My digs are devolving into a flop house! At last it's lived in. For a long time I kept it exactly as I found it after the contractors left. I couldn't believe it was really my home.

I felt like I was in just another hotel room or a friends house.

For those coming late to this saga I was homeless for seven months.

...long story.

Anyway nearly two of those months was lived on the streets. Naturally I'm writing a one man show about it. ...stay tuned.

So having lost one, "Home" means a great deal to me.

Slowly I've come to feel comfortable enough to be a slob,..again.

I'm Home!

Home is where you can walk around butt nekkid eating a ham sandwich with the radio, and tv on loud while talking to yourself.

Glory, Hallelujah!

Anyway above is my corroding kitchen, bathroom,...both sinks leak, and bedroom, no quilts, pillows, flowers, or pictures.

It's wonderful!

Not only that, but today a mysterious stinky smell turned up. It seems to move about.

A sure sign of evil spirits.

Tonight it's in my tiny closet. 'Can't quite place what it is. Could be dead laundry, ten year old cabbage, zombie sweat socks,...evil spirits?!

Well there's plenty of Haitian Voodoo priest in the 'hood maybe I could get one of them or the Mexican Christian Charismatic family that lives upstairs to come down, and kick Satan or whoever out of my digs.

My dear sister got me a tv,..see pixs.

It's one of them new hi-def, digital flat things. I have no idea how the contraption works. The damned thing came with an instruction 'book'. Yeah I said "Book".

Good Grief!

I'm grateful as hell, but what the heck happened to "plug it in, and turn it on?" Now I know how my Grandma felt when my Ma, and Dad gave her a color tv back in the early 70's.

She never used it. She was afraid it'd catch fire, and explode.

Stay Tuned.


Lino said...

"Not only that, but today a mysterious stinky smell turned up. It seems to move about."

Ethnic neighborhood.

Here on the upper east side we get to enjoy distink-tive aromas of what some have paid $100 a plate the occasional hood fire.

Hope my new neighbor, the one trying to adopt that African boy will like being in restaurant alley.

As for stinky homes, well, nothing beat our old town house on 72nd bet Madison & Park. Luxury you say?? How about having DC electricity so that you can't have -any- modern (early 1960s era) appliances. NO tv or Hi-Fi, nothing with a transformer. Did have a tiny private elevator w/bare bulb which my Father and I rode for "entertainment" -my Mother, the smart one would not use it.

Then the stinky part, since we were so close to both the Park and railroad under Park ave, we had an insoluble -rat- problem.

The last straw came during thanksgiving when one dies somewhere in the interstitial spaces and we could not find it. Perfect timing. We took our celebration to my Aunt's small but rat free apt.

Anyway, look for smells near the floor line, under there is where things often meet their end. Most likely though you have a case of air currents bringing the aromatic neighbors to to you.

Uncle 2012 said...

Hi Lino,

Luxury indeed!

Boy it was a good thing my family was working class.

We had a 'nice' smelling Bklyn brownstone.

...the kind only the upper middle class can afford now.

Back then my dad on a baker's salary provided a house, sent us to catholic school, and later university.

Imagine such today.

This 'used' to be a hellava country.

Anyway so far no wildlife in my happy digs. However the "smell" still moves about,..and changes.

Different stinkiness levels.

You have a point it's probably the cooking. There's this guy that goes to Broad Channel to fish.

When he come home the whole damned building is toxic.

Good grief the guy is actually eating the mutant martian fish from the bay!

Seems to like it too!

Did I mention the strange sounds. I think there's secret factories here.

Our dear concierge perhaps getting a cut?

Anyway there's a probable dvd bootleg hothouse, a sweatshop, and a fence for stolen car batteries in the basement.

Hey it's cool with me all this. Folks have to make a living, but they're noisy.

Anyway as you can see the digs are coming along swell.

More as events happen,...and they will!


Uncle 2012 said...

...African boy?

Uncle 2012 said...


That's right the holidaze. Humm, my first open house holiday gala's.

I better get started on the planning!

Lino said...

"Anyway there's a probable dvd bootleg hothouse, a sweatshop, and a fence for stolen car batteries in the basement."

HA! They are more capitalist than we....

If you are lucky you might find a Mex family that makes (and sells)"churros" -they are essentially straight donuts with typical powder sugar or plain.

As for bootlegs, most of my friends are Mex or Asian and have gotten computers that I have rebuilt for them. They -always- ask for cd and now dvd burners.

When there is a sale on blanks at Best Buy etc. you'll often see these little guys stocking up.

"African Boy" Madonna: My future neighbor. I am not looking forward to this. It will take up to a year for the renovation of the bldg and in that time I hope she changes her mind.

Yeah, this was a helluva a country.

When we moved to an apt, my neighbor was a phone installer. His wife stayed at home looking after his 3 kids, he had a 2-3 year old car and rented a bungalow in the Rockaways each summer. Sent his kids to Cat-lick school too.

BTW: That townhouse I mentioned went for around $60k back in 1956. My Father bought it on the G.I. Bill (mortage).

It's sad to realize what has happened to the relatively easy American dream we once enjoyed.

We have allowed capitalism to become "holy" and it has eaten us.

Uncle 2012 said...

Eaten to the bone, and last drop!

R K W said...

I just love your little "gadgets" and knic-knaks! You are quite the collector!

Cannibal said...

You probably need a proper antenna for that lcd tv. No big woof.

Uncle 2012 said...

Yeah I have an unit ready to plug in. 'Least till I get the cable connected.

So soon I'll have a nice crib, full fridge, tv, cable, and swell toys.

I'll have no reason to ever leave the house again.

*Well okay I sit on the fire escape sometimes.

*This btw is a requirement of all Emerald City residents.

...except when it's raining.