"Passage to Paradise"

Secret entrance to Heaven in the Bronx. Btw you have to be quick about finding it.

It moves from time to time.

Last week it was in Mexico City. As to tonight I’m told it’s somewhere in Brixton U.K. Nursery Road I think, sorry I don’t have the exact address.

Still, keep looking.

I always thought this was an interesting image. A WW2 tank in shallow water. I wonder about the story of the guys that were in it. What happened, and such. Alot of armor went down when their barges were hit while assaulting defended Japanese islands.

"It don't get Better than This!"

"The Aliens are Gay!"

Just as I suspected.

"Doll Heist"

In the interest of spreading joy, and happiness to the mass's. Uncle Sydney, and pals have planned a revolutionary doll expropriation.


In short the proletariat deserve decent toys.

The following is a rough transcript of a conversation between this reporter, and our Dear Uncle. For the purposes of security, but mostly because Uncle said he'd "bust a cap up my lame butt!!" I shall refrain from spilling the beans on where our esteemed Uncle is holded up.

Uncle begins,.."See me, and the boys plans to knock over a particular doll factory in north Jersey, right." We'd scoped it out awhile back. So we knows they gots da goods we wants."

"Well, the plan is to bust in there disguised as the 1955 Brooklyn Dodgers. The historical angle, cute huh."

"Anyway we know the Feds has targeted the joint for a "swoop'n scoop!"

"You know bag the workers, and send'em back to Mexico."

"This after them guys had paid off these bastards to leave'em be. Ha! Well them cossacks took the dough alright, but plans to scoop 'em up anyhow."




"Crap like that burns me up!"




Well through our connections with the Buddhist Mafia, and the Catholic Worker we got all the folks at the factory 100% legal fool proof phony Green Cards! So they're okay.

The gringo federales won't be able to say bleep to 'em!

"We also gave the comrade workers free tickets to the "Wonder Wheel" at Coney Island. Nice huh?"

"Anyhow with the co-operation of the locals secured, them green cards, we'll load up our trucks with top'a the line dollies. You name it, 1st class "Barbies" with all the trimmings!"

"We'll be boosting classic "Betsey Wetsey" dolls, them hard to get "Gay Bert'n Ernie" upper west side doll sets, and playhouse. Plus assorted big ticket nick nacks that prole kids can only dream of."

"After the heist we'll hit all the ghettos, and trailer parks with the goods. Passing out swell dollies to exploited, and oppressed kids as we go!"

"I can see the headline now,.."TERRORISTS DOLL UP GHETTO!",...Homeland Security Baffled!"

At this point in the interview "Lost" was coming on so Comrade Uncle threw me out of his office, and ordered pizza.
_________________________________________________________________________________

The above relic is from my first blog maybe four, five years ago. I just stumbled on some old files, and thought I slap one up. Yeah it's crap, and not that funny, but it has a happy ending. These days that matters.

"Luna Park"

Luna Park in 1905. Wow! Even when I was a kid back in the 1950's, and 60's Coney Island was nothing like this. Like a glacier in the Andes Coney Island over this last century has slowly melted away.

It went from being a proto Disneyland to a patched up run down splinter palace surrounded by projects. Was that fire works or just another shoot out on the Boulevard of Crack Houses.

Well okay that was the early 90's. It's slightly better now. However now I hear it's gonna get even 'more' slightly better this summer. See below.









Yes it's a shrunken sad tragic version of the vast realm of dreams, and wonders that was the Luna Park/Coney Island of 100 years ago.

Well okay yeah it's an improvement, but still. Mind you I'm going just to have a look. Yeah I'll buy the t-shirt, and have a root beer, but ya know. Com'on comrades this is New fucking York City fer christ's sakes!

Can't some evil plutocrat dump 50 billion bucks on that swamp, and turn it into a Sodom on the Hudson?! Okay, okay, Sodom on the Atlantic, but you gets the picture.

Man Just imagine. An amusement park worthy of the deranged madness of the vast slaughter house that is our Emerald City! Hell I'd go Luna Park and move into a hotel right across the street from the gross neon house of bi-polar batwinged nuns from hell.

Now that's Amusement!

"Peace"

If we could only be more like cats everything would be alright.


__________________________________________________________________________________

The post below is a reprint from about a year ago. This is a guest editorial from my dear pal Bodmin.












"THE CAT QUESTION"

As for cats, after living with five over thirty years, I do consider myself a bit of an expert on them. Unlike what many people believe, cats are social animals, and enjoy human company, (they accept you as a large and eccentric cat) one of their own species.

I know many people who work at home who report that their cat prefers to sleep in their office or studio during the day when they are working there, for the company - which is nicely complementary for your reason for wanting a cat, to have a living thing around as a companion.

If you are out a lot, then it may be better to have two cats, which can keep each other company, or amused, while you are out - and certainly you have to make sure when you do come in that they get attention, groomed, played with, and given a lap to sit on if they are into that.


Cats are adaptable; if they have not been born and raised feral, and particularly if spayed or neutered (and they should be, to keep down the population) they don't mind being indoors.

If you have a farm in the country, fine, they go out to amuse themselves, but cities are too dangerous.

What matters most to them is that they have one or two meals a day, a clean water bowl, AND A CLEAN PLACE TO SHIT.

(You have to keep it clean. Daily.)

Beyond those necessities, a scratching post is advisable (ideally next to where they are fed, which allows you to train them to it by putting a tiny bit of food in the bowl each time they use it), and they love having kitchen counters, cabinets, bookshelves, televisions, computer monitors, windowsills, etc, to jump up on to watch you, or to sleep on.

(Windowsills also allow them to keep an eye on the outside world too).


Radiators are nice to sleep under in winter months. They can be quite happy indoors, even in two or three room apartments.

Cats are not people. They are what they are: sentient animals certainly, each with its own catonality. They will bond to you, and you to them. But again: they are not people.

Bodmin
________________________________________________________________________________________

The above was edited for broadcast, and well...because I could. However it's mostly all there, and makes good sense. Btw I'm still tempted to get a robot cat. We'll see.

"Rage at the Machine!"

You're gonna think I'm making this up. What with the endless traumas of these last few months.

Well there's yet another death in my circle of family, and friends.


Ibrahim a dear pal from the radio station. I posted some pix's of him, and me in the studios, and also greeting the dawn by the Bklyn Br. last fall.

Well Ibrahim lost his ex-wife, and almost his son in a car crash.

Fuck this,..this is fucking nuts.

I think we're getting into Job from the old testament territory now.

What the hell is going on?!

At this rate I should change the title of this blog to the "Obit Page". That is assuming I'm still around to write it.

"Lock Out"

There were 2.9 'million' eviction/foreclosures since that last national election. No this isn't another anti- Obama betrayal rant,...exactly. I just saw on tv that the banks, and their enforcers sometimes foreclose/evict on the 'wrong' house.

So there you are sitting in the safety of your home when the Marshalls literally smash your door in.

Well okay they mostly do that only in poor black neighborhoods. In middle class areas they ring the bell. In any case you're given 15 minutes to get out. Hey I been there, and that 15 minutes is 'exactly' 15 minutes.

The only problem is your bills are all paid, and the bank has no claim. They got the wrong house,..again.

That won't do you any good though. Because they'll toss you, and your family out regardless. Show'em all the paper work you want. Out you go or face arrest.

Eventually the banks will admit the mistake. It seems to take 'only' six weeks to two months for them to get around to it. Yeah they'll clean up the wreck they made of your home. Eventually. However you're emotionally scared for life.

According to that news story there are so many evictions in this country that the system is making errors.

The good news is that the many hundreds of folks this is happening to sue the hell out of these evil bastards. They even collect sometimes.

I bring this up because a person was just evicted on my block. There haven't been any foreclosures here since the fall, but it looks like a new wave is coming.

The person losing everything was a laid off teacher. Yeah just when we need them most they're laying off teachers.

Also as I mentioned in another post they, City Hall, is trying very hard to take bus, and subway passes from school kids. ...let'em walk!

G-ddess forgive us.

As for the eviction it was a horror to see. I noted about a week ago the now common Marshall's sticker on her front door.

A few days later they came to kick her out. She wasn't home, but that didn't stop the bank from taking possession of her house, and 'all' of her belongings.

The banks not only take your house, but if they're 'really rat bastards they take your stuff too.

She came home in the middle of this. It was sad, sad, sad. 'Ugly too. She asked one of the Marshalls if she could take some of here personal items,.."No, everything is the property of the bank."

She then asked if she could have one of her coats. Again "No". If she wanted her property she have to go to court.

These are not nice guys.

In all times, but especially now the New York City Marshall's are the lowest form of life.

They are universally despised.

This is not new. Even when I was a kid no one had 'anything' good to say about them. The general feeling is that if you want to be a thief, but don't want to go to jail,...become a Marshall.

They take a percentage of what they foreclose on. Your home, car, tools, salary. Whatever the system takes from you they get a cut for being the muscle.

There was one decent thing in all this thank gawd. An across the street friend took the evicted teacher in. I haven't seen her since. Her house is padlocked.

Change we can believe in.

"Such a Month"

March has 'got' to be BETTER!

"Spring?"

Well so far so good. We've had a stretch of daze above freezing, and yesterday was actually warm. Warm as in everybody, and their dogs was out on the street making as much noise as possible.


In fact that's what woke me up.

There's them guy a few houses down that play dominoes all year under an aluminum awning regardless of rain or snow. Well with the sudden warm weather they was having a gleeful time yell'n, and slapping the pieces down on the board.

Loud board slapping is apparently a big part of the game, along with threatening each others lives over alleged fast ones.

Kids screaming, and radios playing is a sure sign that spring has returned to the City. The interesting thing is that fossilized carbon encrusted snow from the last blizzard is still huddled in this or that shady corner.

The nice weather reminds me that I still want a cat. More on that later.

Stay Tuned.

"Wonder if they still Talk"

I mean Lucifer, and the Big Guy. They were real close back in the day. I mean from what I hear about them I can't believe that they'd really shut down 'all' of their ties. Long term Companions, and all that.

No I think they still see each other sometimes. I mean if I were to drop by the Bosses place after I gets my wings. Well I wouldn't be surprised to see Lucifer in da'Lawd's bedroom wearing cutoffs with his feet up watch'n the game.

It'd be all cozy, and chummy. The Big Guy would say, "...Sid how'ya do'n!" "Hey Luce toss my pal Sid a cold one will'ya."

Then we'd settle down with our brews, and watch the Brooklyn Dodgers mop the floor with the Pirates,..again. Even in Paradise them poor bastards ain't got a chance. I'd broach the topic of hell, and they'd both bust out laff'n,..beer shooting out's their noses.

Nuff said.

"Angel Attitude"

"Tech Problems"

"Captain?"

"Yes Number One."

"Sorry to disturb, but I believe we're sinking."

"Have you conferred with the ship's Engineer on this matter"

"Eh, I'm afraid he's drowned sir,..along with a number of the passengers."

"Oh dear that does sound serious."

"Indeed sir. ...your orders?"

"Umm, I shall convene a meeting of the ship's officers regards this matter,..after tea."

"Sir."

"A Good Day"

Hell of a month. I'm emotionally fried. Two loses close to me. Plus all the other mayhem of just living in the land of the free. As I type we're having an on-air memorial for our friend Dave Nolan.

Listeners are calling in with their thoughts, and memories about Dave. For you out in the world Dave was a much beloved audio artist, and radio person here in NYC. He did *Dead Head programs.

*The Grateful Dead.

They're a sweet community. Related to the Rainbow Family realm. He was always trying to get me to go with him, and his wife'n kid to one of them Rainbow Gatherings,...google it.

I had images of sleeping in the mud, being eaten by assorted flying, and crawling bugs. All while stoned on hash.

Actually no, they're a zillion times better than that.

So we had a Hippie wake at St Marks in the Bowery. The Art Church. It's also the oldest place of Christan worship in the city. Goes back to the 1600's somewhere.

St. Marks is also where the staff of my radio station Wbai traditionally has their memorials. I'm going to have mine there. We're a pacifist, commie station, and St. Marks is a if not commie then certainly a Peace, and Justice church.

Not many of those around in this country.

Dave once commented that St. Marks was probably the only christian church that would actually welcome the historic Jesus into it's circle.

It is too.

I can see the actual Jesus dressed in his 1AD robes wandering in, and taking a seat. No one would bat an eye. For one this is New York, and we're used to miracles, the other is 'all' are welcome under that roof.

All are welcome any faith or lack there of.

Our Cantor is an atheist.

Aw well, this was a warm, and beautiful day. I think winter ended today. A good warm peaceful day.

I hope you had a peaceful day too.

(A fan tape of the Dead doing "Iko Iko".)