Monday, October 4, 2010
"The Worst Candy In History"
Not since "New Coke" has the junk food empire got it so wrong. The pretzel M&M's taste, and look, on the inside, like sawdust candy. Some comrades, and I had the misfortune of consuming this crap.
One is left with the dry taste of powdered wood chips, industrial glue, unconvincing flavorings, and a minor headache after eating this swell stuff.
The mafia vending machine company stuffed our junk food dispenser with tons of this roach motel fodder. That along with various brands of embalmed cookies.
Alright this mutation won't kill ya, probably, but it sure ain't the refreshing sugar rush you were looking for.
It's projected to be among the 10 'worst' Halloween candies for 2010. (...not counting the traditional apples embedded with razor sharp metal bits, candied meats, and Canadian pennies.)
These maniacs must have made billions of metric tons of this awful stuff, and intend to unload the lot on an unsuspecting public.
Beware you out in the world,..it's coming. Be afraid, be very afraid.
(Even their cute official spokes-digitoons have doubts about this evil marriage of unlikely ingredients.)
...I blame Obama.