Nevermind my pulp fiction end of the world "Endtimes" post below. I gots bigger problems. They's fuck'n ant's in my house. I can't believe this shit! I wakes up, and there's dots move'n around on my sheets.
Naturally I thinks it's my fucked up eyesight,...till I puts on my gottdamned glass's!
Fuck! The little anthocorid, nazi bastards is crawling all over the place including my Bed!! Hey I got no problem with ants. I mean they're not like roach's or spiders'n shit. Nah, they're more like stray cats. Yeah that's it.
'But I don't want no frigg'n stray fuck'n cat in my bed with me, and that goes double for them ants. The nerve'a these little sugar snort'n lowlifes . I'm gonna go out,and buy a hot Roscoe! That's "illegal firearm" to the rubes. I figure a .38 pack'n some nice hollow point slugs ought to teach them creepy bastards who boss!
Right I'll sneak up on the house, kick da door in, and start lighting up them monster's from fuck'n hell,"...BLAM!,...BLAM, BLAM, BLAM, BLAM!!!" Damn. Aint no bugs gonna fuck with the Kid! "BLAM,BLAM,BLAM,BLAM,BLAM,BLAM!!!!"
...More on this story as events warrent.
(CNN footage of the Horror's at my house!)
3 comments:
Damn, and I thought I had it bad with the mice...
You might want to skip the old school "Roscoe" and chuckup to the more trendy campUS fashistoid talkie model:
http://preview.tinyurl.com/55yqzp
I went to that site. Holy crap a talking gun! Not only does it cavitate ya guts, but it talks about ya Mama too.
Indeed, I wonder if it would be good for select bai phone in programs... Might make a thoughtful Mothers day gift or pitch item for the next thon, (make note* consult w/ Ayo) or as an MTA special rebate for the old buses that now act as collective telephone booths... The last remaining bank of booths that I know of are at the Public Library on 42nd & 5th Ave. on the ground floor. They seem so timeless; wood, seat, folding doors, right next to the extra slow elevators.
The MTA is so clever in how to raise it to a higher fare... life or death is kind of extreme though. However, it might thin out the over crowding on certain crosstown routes... I wonder if it would get good reception on the trains? (Further note* ask the P.C. guys on Wed. nite: check the specs about: train reception, call waiting, caller ID, and what time restrictions there are if any as to your voice mail options, to say nothing of "ringing" tones...)
There are times when I get hooked up to certain phone "menus" (that make you an extension of a machine) that have this roulette quality about them, they tend to be government agencies or healthcare related...
I'm sure the blue eagle people would luv this! Has Conregress legislated anything about cell phone dueling? Handy way to leave a timely message ya gotta admit!
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